BREAKING: Donald Trump Invents Socialist Universal Healthcare

 

Photo Credit: The White House

by Bone Jawnson

WASHINGTON, DC > In a shocking twist no one saw coming — except everyone — former President Donald J. Trump announced his groundbreaking universal health care plan this morning.

In a Saturday post on Truth Social, Trump proposed simply giving every American a big pile of cash so they can buy their own health care, effectively merging economics, generosity, and wishful thinking into one convenient policy.

“Finally, some common sense seems to have flowed into this administration,” one supporter commented. The national consensus of “just give them money” appears to align bigly with Trump’s past negotiation style.

At press time, our neighbor was overheard saying, “Finally, our President is using common sense — empowering the community to control and maintain wealth, not private companies.”

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